kokopellinelli: (Default)
Photos and a couple video clips from my most recent boat trip (the one with the annoying little girl? Yeah, that one.)

Pictures and ice falling off a glacier, oh my! )
kokopellinelli: (Processing Giveadamn)
I went on the boats today, on the Meares trip. Got some neat video of the glacier calving, and some photos, which will be coming to an LJ post near you in the near future. There were whales, and sea lions, and puffins, and all sorts of goodness.

The purpose of THIS post, however, is to discuss the little girl who was on the boat today. She was about 6, I think, and let me say this: "NOTE TO PARENTS: THE JOB OF THE BOAT CREW IS TO CREW, NOT TO KEEP YOUR KID OCCUPIED."

Are we clear?

Good.

I like to think that, if I ever have kids, and I thought my child was pestering someone, I would do something about it. Like, make that child stay with me the rest of the day.

I didn't mind it the first time she came up to the galley (10 minutes after we started out) and asked when we would serve the meal. I didn't mind the 2nd or 3rd time, even though they happened within 20 minutes of the first time. But after that, it started to get sort of annoying. Then she asked me if she could have lemonade. I told her she had to ask her mom.

Demon Spawn: "You're my mom."
Busy Nelli: "Uh...no I'm not."
Demon Spawn: "Yes you are."
Busy Nelli: "Nope, I'm no one's mom."
Demon Spawn: "Yuh huh."
Busy Nelli: "Uh, no. Go ask your mom."
Demon Spawn: "Who's Noah?"
Busy Nelli: "Noah?"
Demon Spawn: "You said you were Noah's mom."
Busy Nelli: "Oh, yeah. Uh...*points to Collin, who is minding his own business* That's my son, Noah."
Demon Spawn: "HUH UH! Moms and husbands don't work together!"

Okay.

Finally we served lunch, and all was quiet...for about an hour. Then when I got to sit down to eat my lunch, she came and sat across from me, asking if we had any more.

Eating Nelli: "Nope."
Demon Spawn: "YOU ATE IT ALL?"
Eating Nelli: "No, everyone ate it all."
Demon Spawn: "NUH UH, YOU ATE IT ALL! Y'ALL ARE GONNA BE FAT!"
Eating Nelli: "Oh, I ate it all? Did I eat yours? I'm pretty sure you ate your own."
Demon Spawn: "NO, Y'ALL ATE IT ALL! Y'ALL ARE GONNA BE FAT!"

At least she didn't point out that I'm already fat.

Peter and Collin finally got tired of her spending every spare second back at the galley, asking the same questions over and over, and whining when she learned soup wouldn't be served for another 3 hours. They told her we were having a coloring contest and gave her some crayons and coloring pages. She churned out about 10 during the rest of the trip, then spend about 15 minutes pestering Chris (the captain) up in the bridge to judge the pictures.

When she finally got off the boat (her humpback whale won the contest), she grabbed Collin around the middle for a hug that lasted about a minute and a half, even as he kept saying "Okay, I have to get back to work now. Okay, I have to get back to work now." Her mother was halfway up the ramp and started half-hearted calling, "Catherine, come on now. Catherine, let's go. Catherine, come on."

As they disembarked, her mom said, "Thanks for a wonderful day! And thanks for entertaining her!"

Yeah. Not our job, lady. And thanks for the NO TIP you left for putting up with your annoying daughter. Honestly, we don't expect tips, but it's nice when we basically babysat for 9 hours.

Anyway, it probably doesn't sound as bad as it was, and it wasn't really bad, just annoying.

I USED TO LOVE ALL CHILDREN, WHAT'S HAPPENED TO ME??
kokopellinelli: (Default)
A strange call came into the station today. I answered the phone, "Hello, KVAK."

"Yeah, Ah got a question for y'all," said the brassy-voiced woman on the other end.

"All right," I answered cautiously.

"You know when y'all are readin' the weather, and you say it's like, in the fifties? If you wrote that out, would it be with an I-E-S or a Y-S?"

I blinked, then said, "If we wrote it out, it would be I-E-S."

"And," she continued, "with 'forties,' is that with F-O-R or F-O-U-R?"

"F-O-R," I replied.

"Okay. And it would also have I-E-S?"

"Yes," I said.

"Thanks. Y'all've been very helpful," she said gravely. And hung up.
kokopellinelli: (Holy Crap Sammy)
I'm tired. Been a busy week so far, and it's only Wednesday! (Well, almost Thursday).

Last Friday, Becky and I drove to Wasilla (about a 5 hour drive) to pick up her new puppy! She's a Staffordshire Bull Terrier (NOT a pit bull!) and totally adorable. Beck and I drove up Friday morning, went to 4 or 5 stores in Wasilla, then Coldstone Creamery (yum. OH YUM)and then to the hotel to veg until we could pick up Halle. Then we took her back to the hotel and let her run her fool little head off. She's totally cute and angelic...unless she's awake. Then she's cute and demonic! When Summer met her a couple days ago, I thought we were going to have to be extra careful not to let Summer bully her, but Halle thinks she's Tough Shit and lunges at Summer and bites her on the ears and barks her adorable little bark...she's like a gremlin puppy.

Anyway. Today we had an open house at work. We sent out a whole bunch of invitations to clients, my boss made a bunch of food (dips, bbq meatballs, and a dessert called "Novella's Good Stuff"), and when the clients showed up, we gave them a tour of the station. Kara and Laurie did the meet and Greet, Yvette recorded their holiday messages with them, Sarah took everyone's photo and did miscellaneous tasks that needed to be done, and I showed them how we write, produce, and program ads. It all took place over about 2 hours, and I am very very tired now.

My boss said afterward that she had several people tell her that I did a good job explaining things without making them too complicated or going into "Geek Speak," which made me a little glowy and happy inside! :)

And now, bedtime! Goodnight, all.
kokopellinelli: (Serious)
I'm staying at mom's house while she's out of town, and of course, Summer is staying with me.

As soon as I got home from work today, I decided that we should go for a walk. Most of the time, I don't put Summer on her leash (unless we're walking on the highway or something)...I just bring her ball along. When we're passing a place of potential interest to her, I keep hold of the ball and that keeps all of her attention riveted on me.

We didn't go all the way around the block...we went to the dry creek bed on the next street over. I'd toss the ball into the bed, and she'd retrieve it. Easy.

Across the road from the creek, there lives a lady who keeps geese and chicken. This lady can be sort of mean. She gets mad if you pick wildflowers on the side of the road...not even on her property! And when Beck and I were kids, her husband/boytoy/live-in dick SHOT a stray dog with a beebee gun. The local animal control officer doesn't even like her.

So, knowing all that I know about the lady, you can imagine my horror when my ASSLICKING BITCH OF A DOG took off after a chicken.

That's right, she brought the ball back, and before I could take it from her, she BOLTED across the road and into the woman's yard in pursuit of BARNYARD FOWL.

I ran after her, screaming. Summer chased the chicken around the house. I heard a window slide open and the lady called, "Do you have that dog on a leash?"

Just then, Summer came into view, HOLDING THE FREAKING CHICKEN IN HER MOUTH. I jogged towards her, as she stopped in the middle of the driveway and spit out the bird. It landed on its feet and walked away, clucking, seemingly no worse for wear, but minus the feathers my charming four-legged companion had stuck to her tongue.

I grabbed her and slipped her leash over her head. The lady asked that I keep her on a leash when going by her house. Considering how high her bitch-o-meter can get sometimes, I figure I got off light. I was afraid she'd demand that I pay for all the years scared off that chicken's life.

Anyway. Yeah. I am extremely pissed at my dog right now. She will not go leashless for quite a while.

On our way home, my old friend Matt stepped out on his porch to say hi. He and his family moved into the house two doors down from mom's earlier this year. His mom used to be my babysitter; we used to take baths together when we were babies. I haven't seen him for quite a while. We talked for about 15 minutes.

And tomorrow is setup for the Home Expo. Then, Saturday and Sunday, is THE HOME EXPO. I'm sorta stressed. I just want it to be over.
kokopellinelli: (Totally Amused)
The radio station I work for is putting on a Home and Recreation Expo next weekend. Basically, we called a bunch of vendors (insurance, electronics, taxidermy, photography, rec equipment, clothing, construction, plumbing, food, plants, skincare, etc) to bring some of their wares and set up shop for two days, all in the same space. This way, people can come through and take at look at what these various vendors have to offer (and hopefully buy some crap from them) without having to go to individual stores. In years past, the show has gotten traffic of maybe 300-600 people over the two days (not including kids - we keep track with admission tickets).

Several of our vendors are representatives of larger companies (think like...Mary Kay or something similar, where you shell out a certain amount of money to receive a "starter kit," then receive a commission on the stuff you sell). Sometimes, such reps can get their admission fee for the show refunded at least partially by the company they represent.

There has to be 1000 people! )

I have no idea if any of that made sense.

x-posted to my [livejournal.com profile] customers_suck
kokopellinelli: (Default)
I work for a very small privately owned commercial radio station. We have two full-time employees (me and my boss) and two part-timers. We have a satellite feed that gives us all our music and DJ banter and whatnot; what we do at the station is write, read, and program ads (for businesses in town), PSAs, announcements about public events, and we do the weather twice daily and stuff like that. We also have a program called Kid's Club, where two Thursdays a month, we have a group of kids (4th graders and 5th&6th graders) come in to record scripts about responsibility, reading, safety, character, and other things. Today was 4th grade Kid's Club.

This guy came in to pick up his son. My boss was in the AM studio recording the last script with a few kids. The man glanced in the window then wandered into the hallway to peer into the FM studio.

"Wow, this place is small. I've never been in here."

You don't know like you don't know? )

X-posted to [livejournal.com profile] customers_suck
kokopellinelli: (Default)
So today, we were supposed to have 50-something people on the boat, and 27 of them were gonna be elementary-aged kids from Kenny Lake on their annual educational trip to PWS (with 7 chaperones). They were late. We were ready to board, so we loaded up the 35 passengers who were waiting at the dock and then sat around wondering where in hell the kids were.

Amanda: They're probably singin'.

Me: Singing?

Amanda: Yeah. "Kumbaya" and shit.

Me: Oh god. You think they're gonna be like those people on the port cruise who started singing and formed a congo line?

Amanda: Y'ever seen Children of the Corn?

Me: Uh...the first part. Why, are the Kenny Lake kids like that?

Amanda: Children of the Lake.

John: It's like a cross between that and John Carpenter's Village of the Damned.

Me: Fantastic. Really looking forward to it.

About 10 minutes till cast off, another boat went by our slip, a smaller aluminum boat. There were kids in it. They waved at us.

Me: *jokingly* Think those are the Kenny Lake kids?

Turns out, they were.

Either the chaperones had called our office to cancel but there was a miscommunication, or they just didn't call to cancel. Nice.

Anyway, nothing much else to report. No whales (except a possible Minke that I spotted that we didn't bother to go see because it was being boring) but we did see a pregnant mountain goat down really low on a cliff, napping in a grassy patch.

Oh, and yesterday, I watched a sea lion at Bullhead hump a rock.

And Colleen offered me crew chief.
kokopellinelli: (Default)
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh...

For some reason, they were thinking that there would be like 150 passengers tonight, when the capacity for the boat is MAX 148 WITH CREW, but I think there were only like 87 people, so it was nice. It was the Rotary Club.

We didn't have to do anything with the food, it was all catered. Hors d'oeuvres and booze, really. The thing is, the catering people were told to provide "heavy hors d'oeuvres" and yet ALL the food they provided was GONE by the time we sailed. Literally. We boarded at 6, and by 6:10 the lady who organized the stuff was freaking out because she thought the food would be gone, so she ran to the store and got back at exactly 6:30 (our scheduled departure) with bags of chips, salsa, cookies, rolls, meat, and cheese. So that was okay.

Amanda and I were the only crew, but the catering service provided 3 waitstaff so Amanda and I didn't really have to do anything except talk to people, keep the heads clean and check the trash cans now and then. We saw a mother bear and cub, and a mountain goat...about 50 feet from the bears. Actually, the bears were really hard to see because they were hidden in the brush on the mountainside above us. I had actually seen them before the captain pointed them out, but I didn't have binocs so I thought I was looking at a rock. They weren't moving.

Anyway, good trip. Cloudy, drizzly at times, but the water was like glass. So tired. So hungry. On the boat I had like...two grapes, a slice of cheese, and half a glass of peppermint tea.

EDIT: I thought this was amusing...there were three caterers on board, two women and one gay man. Near the end of the cruise, one of the women (slightly heavier than I) asked if I thought one of the passengers (the youngest man on the boat...late 20s, maybe) was gay. Apparently, the caterers had been discussing it in the galley. I told her I have basically no gaydar, and asked if she was thinking about going for it. Her reply was "GOD no. I'd break him like a twig."

Then she convinced the male caterer, a friend of my friend Ni and very nice guy, to do a "walk-by" and see if Gay-or-Not-Gay checked him out. He walked too fast I don't even think GoNG noticed him going by, but apparently the whole discussion had arisen because GoNG had "reached way over the bar" when Male Caterer was serving him. "He was practically caressing you!" Ha.
kokopellinelli: (Default)
There are people tromping around on my second-floor balcony. Luckily, I got a notice about it.

They're going to power-wash and then paint the deck, which is fine, though Danette told me "Keep your sliding door locked, there's no way I'm letting them in through the apartments." Mindful of this, I also have the vertical blinds drawn as tightly as they can be. I tell myself it's because my apartment is a mess and I don't want anyone seeing in, but actually it's because strange men with access to my balcony, leering through the door at me, is another on my list of experiences to avoid.
More random babblings, along with a rather amusing story about a wild beaver. )

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